I want to show you that I love you
Is there a way in which I can do this?
One day I got sick. Nothing to bad but bad enough to were I couldn’t get out of bed without experiencing some pain. Being a single parent, an illness like this can be hard to deal with.
My child understood I was sick but not why every time I moved I suddenly wanted to cry or why I sat on the couch most of the day.
She always plays even when she is sick and wanted me to do the same. So I had to work through my pain and be there for her. Even when I just wanted to lay down and sleep. I still made all of her meals, watched tv, and played games with her.
I wanted to give up and sleep so bad though. At one point I actually did fall asleep. My daughter stayed by my side the whole time playing on my phone.
I felt like such a monster when I woke up. How could I fall asleep while my child was awake???
But what could I do?
I had no one who could watch her. The last time I went to the hospital over an illness they called CPS cause I didn’t have anyone to watch her while I went to the emergency room and was potentially admitted. So that was out of the question.
Basically I was forced to parent through my illness (which was food poisoning by the way my. My daughter didn’t get it cause she doesn’t eat meat and I was experimenting)
I think most parents, even many single parents, do not think about stuff like this.
How they will go about things sick and without help.
I once knew of a family where both mother and child were wheelchair bound. Do people understand how difficult that is?
We take things for granted all the while judging others for not being just like us.
Sitting in the battle field
Grabbed the man I tried to kill
Looked in the eye and questioned why
Why must we go through life
With blinders in our eyes
Looking forward in days on end
Thinking naught of those who stand
Beside us as we crawl on by
Judge them harshly for choices unknown
As though we do have to make our own
Standing on the battle field
Clutching the hand of the man I tried to kill
Asking God for the reason why
Taking this life was seen as right
What made him beneath me
What made it so we can’t see
Those who stand Beside as
As we crawl through people we can’t see
Bloody hands are grasping me
Eyes clenched but begging me
What gives us the right to what life
Is worth less then another’s
We go through life breathing
Deceiving those who stand close by
Ignoring them with all out might
But judging them if they come within sight
Walking across the battle field
I can no longer feel a thing